American Currency and Coin


Back in the olden days—that would be in the mid 60s, children—I worked in a Shell gas station in Windsor, California for a man named Joe Woodard. I learned quite a bit about being a man and about life from Joe Woodard, and I owe him for that, but that's a story for another day. I also went to High School in Healdsburg, California, and played football and trumpet, had a girl friend, went to the county fair............ But what I'm talking about here is the gas station.

We sold gasoline for somewhere in the neighborhood of 35.9 cents a gallon. Could have been 25.9 cents a gallon.....I just don't recall exactly. Point here is that it made sense to charge something and 9/10ths of a cent for a gallon of gas. Look—you could buy 10 gallons of gas, and that extra 1/10th of a cent per gallon totaled up to a penny. American currency and coin had not yet been completely decimated in value back then, and that penny could be given to your young child, and that child could go to Bob's Market Basket on the Old Redwood Highway and actually purchase a piece of candy for that penny. Anybody got an idea what you can buy for one cent American these days? Nothing. That thing that costs one cent does not exist.

So, why, when gasoline is now $4.15 a gallon here in the rust belt, does the actual price have to be $4.149? What is the purpose of the 1/10th of a cent now?

Exactly, Grasshopper. There's no longer a point to it. Just call it an even cent, OK?

No problem—Just ask me and I'll give you a solution to your pressing problems.

This whole business of our less valuable money brings about a recurring thought of mine. I know, I know.....Here it is anyhow--Our money needs an overhaul.

We now have four actual coins in the Realm—the penny, the nickel, the dime, and the quarter. There's a couple of others that are, um, coined, but not really used—the half dollar and the dollar coins. Then, we also have some paper money in common use—the one dollar bill, the five dollar bill, the ten dollar bill, the twenty dollar bill, the fifty dollar bill, and the hundred dollar bill. There is another that is printed, but not really used--the two dollar bill. There are some bigger bills too, but, as before, not really used.

There is no longer a need for the penny, the dime, the one dollar bill or the ten dollar bill. Just not necessary. My biggest itch here is the penny, which is worthless, and the one dollar bill, which crowds out the real money in my wallet. Here's the fix. C'mon.....It's reasonable--

The new commonly used coins should be:

-The Two Cent Coin
-The Five Cent Coin (the nickel)
-The 25 Cent Coin (the quarter)
-The One Dollar Coin
-The Five Dollar Coin

The new commonly used bills should be:

-The Two Dollar BIll
-The Five Dollar Bill
-The Twenty Dollar Bill
-The Hundred Dollar Bill

As usual, you're welcome. Joe Woodard would have approved. He was a sensible man.

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