Uncle Buck

Television notes from the land of perpetual rainfall—Castle Rock, Washington

The way things are going in this country, I'm pretty happy that I gave up on cable TV when I did. Not that I don't watch stuff on TV, I just don't see much of what passes for video entertainment on any of the major networks. I watch stuff that comes into my living room via my television set, but…….I bet you get my meaning. Here's what made me think of all this:

ABC is releasing a new series entitled “Uncle Buck”. You remember Uncle Buck, right? John Candy…..Mccaulay Culkin. Lotsa laughs and a real humorous movie. Never could be a series no matter what. But that's not quite enough, you see. It's an ALL BLACK Uncle Buck. Gonna be just as popular as the all black Honeymooners, I betcha. Maybe as good as the All Girl Ghost Busters.

No question about it though, the networks need to take some more stuff and Turn It On It's Head!!!!!

The Half-Nelsons. Ozzie is still a dopey inept white guy, but Harriet is a big city black with plenty-o-booty and David and Ricky are the light-skinned wanna-be gangsters. Oh, the laughs will be unending.

The All Mexican Casablanca. Rick's Cafe American becomes Ricardo's South-of-the-Boarder all you can eat taquaria. Ilsa's name is Cricket. Ilsa's really in love with Ricardo, but hooks up with the only honest Federale in all of the Estado A classic in the making, I'm telling you. Maybe it's a Vlasic in the making. You just never can tell. It's all about the cartel drug trade and how Ricardo is really the good guy.

Or, as a radical thought, how about something starring look-alikes of O.J. Simpson and Bill Cosby, but they aren't a murderer and a rapist? Just turning it on it's head, dontcha know.

WAIT…….How about an All-Asian Tuskegee Airmen?? C'mon Hollywood. TURN IT ON IT'S HEAD. You can do it. I just know that you can. I want The Longest Yard from a Woman’s Prison. I want Rocky and Bullwinkle as fish. Y'Know—for the children. I just can't wait to see how they bone-up the Vacation franchise. I don't want a new idea or a fresh thought. I want re-treaded good stuff made acceptable for the Obama Nation.

I could easily go on, but I won't. When I watch a great TV series (on Netflix or Hulu or Amazon) from Ireland like The Fall, or one from Canada like The Republic of Doyle, I have to wonder what became of great story-telling on American TV. I thought we were supposed to be the innovators.

Oh, well. For whatever it's worth, the original Honeymooners on TV scores an aggregate 8.7 stars (out of 10) on IMDB.COM, while the subsequent movie starring Cedric the Entertainer gets a 3.1. As a second in the FWIW department, Mike Epps had a co-starring role in the Honeymooners flop, and is the star in the all new Uncle Buck.

I'm just sayin'…………………………….

The resemblance is just uncanny.


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